Oh expectations!!! They get me every time 🙂
Sure, I am getting some free time, but I often feel like a deer in headlights when that free time comes. Too many things to be done and wants to happen. Just like when we are practicing on the mat, the image we hold in our mind is a falsehood, a distraction from being where we truly are. We think we can do crow beautifully, but after doing it we hurt. We are frustrated. We hate our body, our practice, our teacher. Thar is not yoga. That is acrobatics, mindlessly making shapes with our body.
An expectation is waking up and saying this is exactly how my day will go, how I will feel, and what I will say/do/eat/think. The truth is that life often has a different plan in mind. Being flexible in body and mind is a big part of practice. So as I look at all that I wanted to accomplish this week and it being Thursday (!!!) with maybe two checks off that list, I am reminding myself to surrender to source. To feel content with where I am. To bring focus to what I really want.
So what if I don’t read a book this week? I may have been overly ambitious!
Or does it really ruin my day that I ate toast today even though I am going gluten free and sugar free? Well, no. It did remind me that I feel like crap after eating it though.
My practice can not have expectations if I want to be present in my body, same with life. I need to be softer with myself and be ok when life throws a curve ball or hell, life just happens! It’s more important to be present than be living the ideal day. After all, life also gives me spontaneous snuggle piles and hugs/kisses from the boys. And friends stopping by for coffee and catching up.
Of course, it is important to work towards something, having goals and ideas about what we want to create is good too. Just don’t be so strict that you can’t have space for some spontaneity ❤️